While in the library this last Tuesday, I happened to bring up the subject of technology to the House. She proceeded to tell me a story about a videodisc player she bought circa 1987. I had no idea what a videodisc is, so she went on to explain that it’s essentially a giant, record-sized cd. Right off the bat, this image strikes me as both preposterous and hilarious.
House tells me how this particular piece of very expensive equipment was obsolete something like six minutes after she paid for it. This riveting conversation segued into another technology-themed opus of conversational skills as House began to rant hysterically about how cell phones and television remotes are far too complicated, and that they should not require a Physics degree to use.
Call me an opportunist, but I felt this a good time to point out several things. House doesn’t even own a TV, let alone an overly complicated remote, and she doesn’t have a cell phone either. The reasoning behind not owning such devices of convenience is to the House, a very simple thing. “I don’t have a Physics degree!”
A Physics degree?
“Actually” I began, “I programmed my remote so that I can just bark out the equations at it, and it responds accordingly. E equals m c squared quantity n over k x to the third root, gets me channel three every time.”
Some older denizens of the planet just cannot seem to comprehend the simplicity of this, no matter how much time they spend using the remote. My father, for instance, spends hours watching football on our basement TV, yet he can’t figure out how to switch from dvd mode back to television. No matter how many times I do it for him; no matter how many times I tell him to watch, learn, pay attention, he always winds up calling me back down to the basement to do it again. “Scooooooooooot!” I hear from my mother, relaying the message for my dad. “Dad needs you to fix the TV for him!”
Sigh. The TV is not broken. He just doesn’t know how to use it, and apparently refuses to learn, or even to try to learn. So, I switch from dvd mode back to television mode again, and I tell him to watch, to learn, but I know I’ll be back, switching it over for him again next weekend.
He should get a Physics degree.
-Scott
SH- you are such a good child to take care of your dad. Whatever is he going to do next year when you are gone?!? My dad is about to turn 81, a retired architect and can't figure out the DVD thing either!! Give him a pencil though and he could draw you a picture!
VW
Posted by: Val | December 10, 2008 at 11:38 AM